My teacher hit me

I finally read one of the weekly notes Penny's preschool sends home, and it asked for each parent to make some play-dough and send it to school with their student. I had some on hand, so I am pretty proud of myself for remembering to send it. 

So tonight when I was getting Penny ready for bed, I asked her, "So, did you play with play-dough today at school?"

She looks up at me and says, "My teacher hit me," and points to her cheek.

I tried not to put any words in her mouth while I asked her what happened-- which is not easy with a 3-year-old. But from what I understand, while they were playing with playdough, her teacher slapped her on the face, and then while she was crying, another teacher gave her "star candy" to help her feel better. 

I don't know why. Penny doesn't yet understand "why" or "because," and this isn't the first time I wished she could explain those concepts.

I'm going to talk to the principal tomorrow. I want to know what happened. I want to know what their discipline system is. What are the usual consequences for a child misbehaving (or in Penny's case, probably being stubborn about something)? I want them to know that there is no situation that calls for their hitting my child.

Having said that, I do have to admit that I have spanked Penny before. I spank that little butt when it runs out into traffic or something else quite dangerous. I've slapped her hands when she touched something she shouldn't have. I've spanked her on MY bad days, and those are the ones I regret.

I'm American, though, and I think that corporal punishment doesn't belong in schools, and especially preschools. I know it happens in Chinese schools, and I think I remember it happening in my classroom once. I was teaching some middle schoolers, and I think the other teacher roughly took a kid out of the room, if I remember rightly. But Penny's school needs to know my standards. I've recommended this school to other friends, and they need to understand that none of us tolerate that kind of discipline. 

And if they don't step it up, then Penny doesn't need to be subjected to this just to learn some Chinese. We can just have Chinese friends over for playdates at our house, if needs be.

Let's. Learn. En. glish.

Everyone in China wants their child to learn English. I'm pretty sure it starts in utero-- like how we play Mozart to our children in the womb, Chinese parents play English tapes. Probably. It starts early.
So I went to the bookstore today. (I didn't find what I was looking for, fyi.) There are always nice displays of various English-learning programs for kids. Last time there was a video playing with some native English speakers introducing their DVD set. Holy cow, it's embarrassing! They were some greasy college guys-- the kind that you know are just in China to bum around for a few years, teach a little English for money, and drink a lot of cheap beer. At least they could have showered and gotten dressed before going to work on video day, though! Americans are slobs. Thanks for reinforcing that stereotype, guys!
Today's display was even better. Right when you walk in the store, they have some kids' cartoons playing. I watched for a while, and they were actually old Disney movies, with Goofy and the gang. But it had been dubbed over in reeaaallllyyy sssllllooooowwww, carefully enunciated, monotone English. It hurt me to watch it. But I couldn't tune it out! Goofy finds a wanted poster nailed to the tree, then turns to the audience and says, "Gggooosshhhh. A. Rrrrooooobbbbbbbbbbeeerrr." (But 10x more robotic than you just read that.) It was very clear. The enunciation and diction were beautiful. The native American accent was impeccable. But why would you want your child to learn to taaaaaalk. liiiiike. thaaaaat. And why would your kid want to watch that?
It was so stupid! Kids don't learn language by hearing slow, careful diction. They learn the inflection along with everything else! That's why parents instinctively use a wider range of tones when talking to small children (and pets) than when talking to adults. That's why my kids have better Chinese tones than I do!
And that's why they should have paid their actors more. "Okay guys, twice the money, and now this time, use INFLECTION!"
People should ask my opinion more often.

Naomi: she speaks!

Naomi is learning how to talk at such a speed that by the time I resolve to write down her cute little words, she's already moved on to new ones. Agh! And now, in addition to saying her own words, she'll repeat everything we say to her, so it's impossible to know which words are hers or ours. I would ask her to slow down, but it's just so exciting!

Right in time for Halloween, she can say "Danding" (candy). There are Lifesaver mints in a bowl down in our breakfast room, and every morning after breakfast, she goes and grabs some to distribute. And she eats several.

She's thrilled with her badminton skills.

She has an amazing sense of when people are leaving, getting ready to leave, or even thinking of getting ready to leave. She'll say, "Bye," and wave. She says this when people are getting off the elevator, and she often adds, "Byebye, dai den" (byebye, zai jian).

She calls dogs "dodo," which is a great mix of English and Chinese.  She says "ni hao" and "ayi hao," and for both of them she really closes her mouth around the last "aooo." When she doesn't want me to do something, she'll either yell, "No!" or alternately what I'm realizing is "bu yao!" She learns a lot from her sweet older sister, Deh-deh. 

She can finally tell us, "Down," when she wants to get down from her highchair or stroller. If she's holding something and it's hers, she'll tell us, "Meimei de." (That's Chinese.) For a while she was saying, "Mine de" (English and Chinese).

She likes to push the stroller and push her shoes on. For both, she's happy to chime in with, "Push!" When we're sitting down and want to help her put on shoes or her jacket, or when she wants to sit in our laps, she turns around and then backs up into our laps. She'll usually start a foot or two away, but I've seen her turn around and back up from 5 feet away. We're trying to teach her to go, "Beep, beep, beep, beep." I'll let you know how that progress goes.
Penny's kind of forgetting to say "please" very much, so we're emphasizing it a lot in our house. I guess it's sinking in somewhere, because if Meimei wants something, she'll sometimes come up to me, arms outstretched, and say, "Peeeeeease."

The baps:

She loves applesauce (bappo). The other day we went apple picking out at an orchard, and now she likes to reach for the tomatoes on my tomato bush: "Bappo!"
She likes to wear backpacks: bap-bap.
She also likes to play with Dad's iPad: bap-ba.

Magic carpet

Okay, okay. One last post about our trip, and then I'll move on to real life. 

One of my grand plans for our vacation was to buy a nice carpet. When you think about the Silk Road, you should probably think of carpets, since it goes right through Persia and all. Kashgar is still a big trading hub for all the central Asian countries, even nowadays where not many people travel by camel caravan anymore. Though we did see a man and a woman traveling by camel at one point. But anyway... Persian rugs.

In Kashgar we went to a few rug shops around town, one by the mosque and another by the bazaar. I love rug shopping! You walk from the busy, loud street into the little shop, and there's a sudden hush. The entryway, floors and walls are covered with carpets, and some even hang from the ceiling. And after all the available space for displaying carpets is used, the rest are rolled up or stacked flat along all the walls. Then the proprietor starts showing you rugs. He just starts on one stack and starts unrolling them and laying them out on the floor for you. They're beautiful. He tells you where each one is from, how old it is, if it's handmade, what it's made from. Each one has a little story. (It seemed like all the old ones were 80 years old. I'm not sure how you'd test that without being an expert-- which I am not.)

At some point, I start feeling bad that so many rugs are piling up and I'm not buying one yet. Once we leave, the owner will have to roll them all back up. But on the other hand, this time I am a real customer. I really do intend to buy one. And this is how you shop for rugs.

I can't really tell the difference between most of the rugs by region. The shops had Uzbek rugs, Iranian rugs (i.e., real Persian rugs-- China still trades with Iran, I guess), Afghan rugs, Pakistani rugs, and Kazakh rugs. There are different designs and different styles, and they're all very beautiful.

Kazakh rugs are quite different from the rest, though. Instead of a woven rug, it was more of a felt quilt. The designs, instead of being woven in, are other pieces of felt appliqueed in place. I don't know enough about it to say if this is always true, but in both the stores we went to, all the Kazakh rugs were this style.

We had kind of given up on actually buying a rug after the first store. But the next day we decided to visit another store-- just to look. The man started pulling out rugs and rolling them out. We told him we might be interested in a long one (for a hallway rather than a whole room). He pulled out rug after rug, and they were nice-- but nothing I could see myself buying or using. 

Then he unrolled the magic carpet. It made me sigh out loud, it was so beautiful. Some rugs had been overly bright-- reds and oranges. Some were rather dull-- just neutral colors with other neutrals. They were pretty, but matched nothing in our house. But this one stood out from the rest. It had red and blue, and then the background was white, making the designs stand out. The blue and red flowers were raised and fuzzy, while the white part were tightly woven and lower. It's made of wool, but the fringe is camel hair. (!!!)

It was really long. I thought it would fit our hallway, but Kevin thought it would fit our hallway plus half our living room. Turns out, we were both wrong. It fits our hallway plus about one foot of our living room. I think it looks marvelous.

So yeah, we bought it. The man started by asking 2400 yuan. I'm a terrible bargainer, so it's a good thing Kevin was there. We bargained for a minute, and then his friends came in to bring him lunch. We were offering 1800, and he was asking 2100. But when his friends came in, he just said, "Okay, let's just do 1800. You can have it." I'm sure he was happy with that price and didn't want to haggle in front of his friends. So, we were both happy!

After we got home, I went to Ikea to compare prices. Ikea in China sells Persian rugs-- from Iran. I guess China doesn't have a problem with it, and neither does Sweden. They didn't have anything exactly like this. Ours is handmade, and the ones at Ikea were machine made. One at Ikea that was a similar size, but only about half as long was priced at 9900 yuan. 

Um... we scored a deal! (Until you factor in plane tickets, of course....)

So here are the pictures of our lovely rug:

Isn't this gorgeous? I kind of want to make a corresponding quilt with red stars and blue sashing or something.
You can tell the rug is handmade, partially because the right edge isn't straight. In this picture you can see that it kind of bulges. But as they say, there are no straight lines in nature. Or in handmade stuff. :)

A close-up of one of the flowers. Each flower is a little different and not even quite perfect. But I love that it has handmade personality!
And I think that's Naomi's foot. I have a lot of help around the house-- whether I need it or not!

Camel hair fringe!

Room enough for Abu--even elephant-sized Abu!

Penny's highlight

Hands down, Penny's highlight of our trip was..... RIDING CAMELS! 

Penny and Dad got to ride a big, brown daddy camel

Mommy and Meimei got to ride a white daddy camel. I asked the guide if the camel had a name. He looked at me, looked at the camel, looked at me, and said, "CAMEL!" As good a name as any, I suppose.
Meimei was pretty enthralled with the camel's fuzzy hump. It was a fun ride! The blanket made it quite comfortable!

This area is called the Flaming Mountains. It's famous because of one of the Chinese classics, Journey to the West. It's the story of a monk and his friends (including Monkey King!)  who journey out to Xinjiang (the west) in search of the Buddhist scriptures. And I guess they came here!

At the end Penny got to ride one all by herself.

Turpan

I still want to post a bit more about our vacation, since it was our "big trip" of our tour here in China. I may post a few more before I get back to writing about real life again. 

Turpan was our last stop on the trip-- and definitely one of the highlights. Geographically, it's a really interesting place. It's a really deep valley (98 feet above sea level) right below the Tianshan mountain range, which has peaks at 12,000 feet above sea level. So it's quite the valley! It's absolutely dry as a bone. We had people tell us it only rains one, two, or three times a year. And yet this is where China's grapes, raisins, and incredibly good melons come from. Marco Polo wrote about this area, and while he didn't write much about each place he visited, he did mention both the melons and the raisins. Yes, they are THAT good!

The courtyard at every home and even many streets were covered in these grape trellises. They provide sun for the grapevines and shade for everyone else. Plus, the grapes hang down so they're easier to pick. My family grows grapes. They need some of these!

Back in the 1300s, people dug wells running from the Tianshan mountains (where the water table is really high) all the way down into Turpan and the surrounding valley. There are still open irrigation ditches running all through town. This is the museum showing the old wells and how they were dug. When I went 10 years ago, there was just a well to look at. Now there's a whole museum, with an underground section where you can see the water running through the wells.

Penny running down the terrace. See? I NEED one of these trellises!

They don't grow grapes just for decoration-- even at the Karez irrigation canal museum. These women were sorting grapes and raisins. We went to go watch, and they filled Penny's hands with raisins. When her hands were full, they filled her pockets, too. I swear, these little girls get more freebies than I ever thought possible!

We went to the old city of Jiaohe. It was the capital of this area from like 100 BC until the Mongols invaded in the 1300s. And it was a big city! The ruins kept going and going and going!

It was dry and dusty, which must be why they are so well preserved.

But right down the cliff face (natural city wall), there is the greenest of fertile valleys. It was cool and fresh down there, which was such a stark difference from the city above! Being in this part of the world just reiterates how vital water is to life! If I was a traveler on the Silk Road, I would be so grateful to find a place like this!

We wandered through the city of Turpan. The residential areas have dirt streets and brick buildings. 

Every spare space has grapevines, and every home has a raisin-drying shed (that's the room with holes in it on the left).

We wandered around, and after we took a picture of their vineyard (above), this family came to say hi and invited us into their courtyard. The daughter (on the right) spoke Mandarin, so we spoke mostly with her.

We stayed for a total of about 5 minutes, but they brought out raisins, tea (from Islamabad), homebaked Naan, and some fried noodles for the girls. We ate a bit to thank them for their gracious hospitality, but we feared if we stayed much longer they would start up the stove and cook us a meal! It was a really neat visit.
We didn't have anything to give them in return, which we felt awkward about. We decided in the future, we should ask for their mailing address, and then we could send them pictures from our visit. Oh well... next time!

I peeked inside the family's open doors, and they had a bed like this in the main room. (This was at the Karez irrigation museum in the courtyard.) Honestly, I don't know enough about Uyghur culture to know if it's the dining table or a bed or both. But it was cool to see that they had BEAUTIFUL carpets on the bed and adorning the walls of their home. It would have been a beautiful picture-- but not one I'd take of a stranger's home!

Some courtyards had some beautiful decorated doors.

In Kashgar and Turpan, we heard music throughout the day wherever we went-- traditional drumming along with a piercing reed instrument melody. Since we never saw the people playing, we just assumed it was being played on speakers. But eventually we found the source: trucks driving around town with the band playing in the back. Of course, right?
We asked someone about it, and he said it was a wedding. Since it's fall and the grape harvest has been sold, the farmers have money, and it's a big wedding season.

Politicians and diapers: Why the president should be changed often

Whenever my dad finds something truly old and nasty in the back of the cupboard or fridge, he'll pull it out, dust it off, and announce that, "These (canned figs, moldy carrots, etc.) must be from the Truman administration!" I'm not really sure when that was, but I know it was a long time ago, before I was born, and before my dad was even born. Produce has a shelf life, and so do many other things.
In June, Penny's preschool went on a field trip to the countryside. The actual title of the place was, "The new countryside learning center" or something. It was essentially a big park with fountains and sculptures, some chickens and peacocks in cages, and a couple museums to check out. One museum had farm tools, old and new. There was a museum near the front called something like, "Chairman Mao's Red Army" or something like that. I'm kind of sad we didn't get a chance to visit it.
Back in the days of the Cultural Revolution (~1966-76), Chairman Mao sent students, intellectuals, and I think basically everyone out to the countryside to "learn from the peasants." It was forced hard labor, and from what I've read and heard, it was all pretty inane. People were sent to the Gobi desert in the middle of winter to dig under the sand until they found clay. Then they were to cultivate the clay and plant melons. In the desert. In the clay. In the winter. Um.... yeah. Stupid. They eventually lessened the emphasis on learning from the peasants, but I get the feeling that this June's field trip was essentially the modern-day learning from the peasants.
Why I'm mentioning this: One of the signs I saw in the "countryside learning center" showed portraits of all the Chinese presidents. There was Chairman Mao, Deng Xiaoping, Jiang Zemin, and Hu Jintao. Period. That's all. I checked on wikipedia, and there's more to the story than these four, but essentially, these were the guys holding all the power (and I do mean ALL THE POWER) from 1949 to the present day. Four. 1949 was the middle of the Truman administration.
Can you name all the presidents from Truman until now? I can't, but let me try:
Hmmm, Truman, obviously. Eisenhower. Kennedy. Johnson. Ford. Carter. Reagan. Bush, Sr. Clinton. Bush, Jr. Obama. And one more.
See, I can't even name all the presidents we've had in that time period! (Nixon! I forgot Nixon. Sorry.) But my point is, there were a lot. And that's how it should be. Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed, often, and for the same reasons.
A lot of people I talk to here in China are pretty interested in our upcoming election. They don't have anything like this here. There is just one party, and the way you would become president is to work your way up in the party. I guess there are elections for some positions, but only party members can vote for them. And they all know who's going to get the position anyway.
The fact that I could run for president in a few years is completely unthinkable here in China. (Okay, so it's unthinkable to me, too. But theoretically. I could run. I would't win, but I could run. And that's cool.)
People here like to talk about how good looking the presidential candidates and their wives are. Based on everything people have talked to me about, I have no doubt that if Chinese people got to vote in this election, that would be the #1 priority. And I know that some people in America also do that. But this time around, we'll get a handsome president, either way, so maybe people will look at a few of the issues. I hope so.
Everyone knows that government leaders here in China are insanely corrupt, but there's nothing the average person can do about it. In fact, if the average person thought that (as a random, non-Shenyang-specific example) there should be more trees or more parks in a city, there's no avenue for a person to address that problem. The people have no rights, and the government has all power. And it chooses its own president... once every 20 years or so.
I'm absolutely sick of the American election already-- even with one more month left. I'm tired of how it polarizes people into making statements like, "No one with a brain would ever agree with _____," and, "_____(insert politician's name) is going to send our country straight into the trash," etc. But I am intensely grateful for the way I am allowed to have a hand in directing our country. I can decide what is important to me and vote my conscience. It's a small way to make a small difference. And if I think that my hometown needs more trees or more parks, I can go out and campaign for it. I can contact my government leaders. I can organize groups to support me. These are huge blessings, and I have to remember how grateful I am for them! Whether you think the president should change this time, or not again until four more years, I hope you can also be grateful for the flexibility and fluidity of our government. It's not perfect, but it's better than many.

Urumqi-- specifically, Tianchi

An hour or two outside of Urumqi, there's a beautiful mountain lake called Tianchi, which means Heaven's Pool in Chinese. We went there as a family when we adopted Daniel, and then I didn't get to go when I was teaching English, because I broke my leg the night before our trip. So I wanted to take my family up, partially because it's beautiful, and partially to see how it had changed.

The first time I went, we all drove up in a minibus, and it was probably the most terrifying ride of my life. There were some steep mountain switchbacks, and instead of any guardrails, there were little concrete posts, maybe 20 feet apart from each other. I was happy to see this new development:

Guardrails!

And instead of driving all the way up, it has now been turned in to something like a National Park, and there are buses at the front gate that take you up to the top.

I like the fancy script on the bus, making the Chinese characters look also Arabic. Pretty cool!

 Heaven's Lake IS a beautiful lake:

Kevin took this gorgeous picture with the fall leaves, snow-capped peaks, and glistening lake. It really does look like this!

 Originally, I'd planned this leg of the journey because I wanted to stay the night up in a yurt. But the previous day was really cold, even down in the city, and we knew we'd freeze if we went up camping, especially with our little girls. Plus, we'd get no sleep, and it would basically be the worst vacation choice in the world. So we just did a day trip.
And so did everyone else in Urumqi. It was part of the Chinese National Day/ Mid-Autumn Festival holiday, so everyone had the day off. We walked up the frost-covered road along with hundreds of other tourists and didn't quite feel like we were in the tranquil bliss of nature. Also, you can't quite capture it in a picture, but there was a stage built on the lakeside. It would have been a beautiful backdrop for a Shakespeare in the Mountains kind of production, but since it is China, they were blaring bad Karaoke. (Is there any other kind?) So, while it is a beautiful mountain lake, we were sharing it with hundreds-- thousands by the time we left-- of other tourists, and enjoying it with a piercing soundtrack of Chinese pop.

We hiked away from the music until we found this waterfall. 

On the way back to Urumqi, there were camels grazing along the road. Awesome!!

I saw this lion sculpture juggling two little lion cubs, and I wanted to take a picture with my own squirmy little cubs.

Kevin's idea for an impromptu crib.

National Day

It felt strange to celebrate China's National Day (the day the Communist Party established the People's Republic of China in 1949) in Kashgar. It feels so entirely non-Chinese! We had just gone to the livestock market the day before, and while there were more people than I ever imagined, there were far fewer here at the National Day celebration.

I was happy we happened to be in the center of town for it, though, since there was a dance performance, and I absolutely love Uyghur dancing. It was a fast dance, which is different than I'd seen before, but it was still really fun.

The girls got to run and play on the plaza. They don't have a lot of opportunity for that in China.

Naomi liked checking out the fountain.

I had some fun taking pictures-- and there's a video at the bottom of this post, too.

Or if that doesn't work, this is the link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZtFC7vyiu4&feature=plcp

Xinjiang trip: Kashgar

Kashgar is just about the furthest thing you can get from China while still being in China. I think 99% of the people I met, talked to, or even saw on the street were not Han Chinese, but mostly Uyghur, Kazakh, Uzbek, or any number of other nationalities. We brought a map with us when we took a cab anywhere; Even though Kevin and I are both fluent and comfortable in Chinese, our cabbies usually were not. Our hotel staff spoke better English than Chinese-- which says a lot, seeing as how they are technically Chinese nationals!

When I taught English in Xinjiang back in 2002, it was only a few months after September 11, 2011, and our US relations with Afghanistan were obviously very volatile. We weren't allowed to visit then, and I didn't realize until this trip just how much we'd missed out. 

It is about 200 miles away from where Afghanistan borders China, and while it's always a good idea to be a careful traveler, I didn't feel like I was bringing my family into a warzone-- because I was not. 200 miles is a long time, and a national border means a lot. Consider the difference between Juarez and El Paso. I would be careful if I went to El Paso, but I wouldn't even think about taking my family on a trip to Juarez. And it's only a few feet away. But it's a different country. And China is still China.

At one point, while talking to our hotel staff in the lobby, I looked out the window. I gasped a little and asked, "What's going on?" There was a group of about 8 PLA soldiers in full riot gear-- helmets, shields, most with clubs, and two with automatic machine guns.

The hotel manager looked around, confused. "What do you mean? Nothing's going on--- Oh, that."

Her colleague nodded. "Kashgar is very.... safe," he said.

China is still China. We don't have the military patrolling the streets in Shenyang where we live. Even when there were recently large, mostly-sort-of-peaceful protests outside the Japanese consulate, the soldiers sent to keep guard didn't have machine guns, just riot gear. But in Kashgar, they have them every day.

There's a reason many people in Xinjiang feel oppressed, and there's also a reason I felt safe.

Anyway, here is what we did:

Here is the old city. I imagine camel caravans on the Silk Road encountered a sight not much different than this, even hundreds of years ago. 

The old city reminds me of Taos, NM. This could have easily been a picture of the Taos Pueblo.

We stopped and let our girls play with some Uyghur children playing outside their homes in the old city. This little guy liked our stroller, so we gave him a little ride in it. I'm not sure where Penny had run off to.

Another perspective of the old city. Sheep still graze on the meadows around the area.

We walked with this man for about 15 minutes, him chatting in Uyghur and us trying to make sense and respond in Chinese. He was so friendly and open-- something I love about most of the Uyghur people we met.
He had four sons and a daughter, and he told us proudly that his daughter was very beautiful. It seems like Uyghur women are ALL very beautiful, with dark eyelashes and beautiful eyes.

Kevin especially liked these oven-baked buns, filled with sheep meat. They were very tasty! And I love how we don't blend in AT ALL. 

We visited a livestock market where tons of sheep and cattle were being bought and sold. I was impressed to see many sons helping their dads at the market. One little guy must have been 7 or 8, and he was straddling a sheep and shearing it with hand shears. You don't see that sort of stuff very often with Chinese parents. Usually, a Chinese child (up through high school) has their parents and grandparents doing things FOR them, and hardly ever do you see a child given responsibilities.

Cattle for sale

CAMELS (!!!) for sale! I was so excited to see them! And they're so fluffy and nice looking. Other camels I've seen have been all clumpy and nasty looking. There were probably 7 or 8 camels here, and they were beautiful!

I think these are yaks.

Here's a cute little Uyghur girl! Well, she has the hat, at least.

One Uyghur man said that Penny looked like a little Uyghur girl, with her dark eyelashes and yellow hair. And it's true!
Penny's lip is all purple in this picture, not only because she'd just drunk half my black current juice (tangy and delicious!), but also because she sucks her lip so far into the bottle that it stays red permanently. She's a silly little girl.

So... Kashgar was awesome.